Clothes make the baby

Baby clothing is the bane of my existence. Everything is either too big, too small, or too ugly.

It was easy for the first year or so when we didn't socialize, especially during the warm weather when he could just hang out in a onesie. We'd go visit other parents and their kid would be in a tuxedo but ours would have a barrel with suspenders. Unfortunately, now that he's out and about more often it's getting hard to stay on top of what fits and how it looks, and though I know nothing about fashion I am able to predict how much my wife will complain about whatever outfit I cobble together each day.

The exception to this rule is that one piece of clothing that always seems to fit, probably made from unstable molecules. You put it on him when he's four months and it fits fine, then a year later you put it on him again and realize that he's doubled in size but this thing still covers his Buddha belly.